Moms, I see you.

You've probably heard, in some way shape or form, about the current trial of Lindsay Clancy.

⚠️TRIGGER WARNING⚠️

If you haven't, in short, she is on trial for the death of her 3 children. Her defense argues she suffered a psychotic break from postpartum psychosis. The prosecution claims it was premeditated.

This is not a post about my opinions on the trial. Even though I definitely have them.

It is a post broadly discussing women's mental health, particularly related to motherhood.

This post is also collective check-in on moms or moms-to-be. As a mom, I have been affected by this trial. I feel flabbergasted, yet not surprised, but still shocked, angry, sad, agast, and so many other emotions as I watch clips of the trial.

One particular clip of the trial has stayed with me. They were reading excerpts of her journal entries. The prosecution seemed to be trying to portray her as crazy and unstable. The defense seemed to use the entries to show she was trying her best, very concerned, and therefore it was not premeditated. Below are some of those journal excerpts.

(For context, sleep training often involves some duration of letting the baby cry.)

Here is what Lindsay wrote about her experience of sleep training:

• "It just about killed me".

• "I want to die."

Here is what Lindsay wrote regarding motherhood struggles:

• "I'm drowning everyday. I'm completely overwhelmed trying to take care of three kids."

• “I have crazy brain fog. I feel like I can’t make a plan. I can’t carry it out. Like I just live moment to moment, waiting for the next nap time. I’m terrified of Cal [the baby] getting overtired now because I feel I can’t help him."

• “It’s like I’m desperate to get a mental break from taking care of everyone. My mind is trying to make something physically wrong with me. My mind never shuts off. It’s constantly thinking of the next thing someone needs. I can’t shut it off. I desperately want to go back to work, but now I don’t know how I’m going to function, and it worries me.”

• “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I want help. I want to be well.”

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I want help. I want to be well.”

Honestly, listening to those be read aloud made me feel nauseous. Not because they are horrible, but because they are relatable. It brought my body right back to those postpartum moments. I had postpartum anxiety and depression with both my daughters, but significantly worse with my first child. I had these type of thoughts. I had those exact thoughts with sleep training. I had suicidal ideations. At times, I really believed my family would be better off without me. And I work in mental health. My husband is a therapist. My two best friends are therapists. I was surrounded by support and had the privilege to see a therapist specialized in PPA/PPD. From what I can tell, Lindsay had family support and sought out professional support too. My point is having access to support and receiving support are only part of the equation. A very important one, but we are also delusional if we think it is as simple as having access to and receiving it. It is very complex and nuanced.

After hearing those journal entries, I thought "oh dear god, so many women have these types of thoughts, feel immense shame about them, and now they are witnessing those thoughts be used as a weapon against them".

(Reminder, this is not a post on the trial or impending verdict).

In an article by PBS the author writes:

Prosecutor Shanan Buckingham sought in an opening statement last week to keep jurors' focus on the defendant, not her doctors.

"This is not a public debate about women's mental health and how the medical system treats women," Buckingham said.

But it has stirred a public debate about women's mental health and how the medical system treats women.....and I'm glad it has. I am furious that it takes instances like the Clancy trial to do it. I'm outraged society doesn't change much as a result.

It is not much, but I will join the other mothers shedding light on how the system at large has failed us. Let us at least have an open mind and be more aware of it.

If convicted of murder, Lindsay Clancy faces life in prison without parole. If found not guilty due to a lack of criminal responsibility ("insanity defense"), she would be committed to a state mental health facility. I can't help but wonder if this would be different if our country had a social safety net for mothers.

• The U.S. is the only high-income country in the world with no national paid maternity leave. (Commonwealth Fund, Oct 2025)

• The U.S. spent about $14,775 per person on health in 2024 — nearly double the comparable-country average of $7,860. (Peterson-KFF Health System Tracker, pub. March 2026 · 2024 data)

• Despite higher healthcare spending, the U.S. maternal mortality rate is the highest of any high-income country. 50% of comparable nations to the US are under 5 per 100,000. (Commonwealth Fund, published Oct 2025 · 2023 data)

  • In the US, Black mothers died at 44.8 per 100,000 births — more than three times the rate for white mothers (14.2). (CDC/NCHS, Maternal Mortality Rates in the United States, 2024, published March 2026 · 2024 data)

• Mental health conditions are the underlying cause of 22.5% of pregnancy-related deaths. Suicide is the manner of death in 31.3% of those. (Policy Center for Maternal Mental Health, 2025 · CDC MMRC data from 46 states, 2021 deaths)

  • About 30% of preventable pregnancy-related deaths happen between 43 and 365 days postpartum — precisely the window U.S. mothers are least supported. (CDC, 2025)

• The U.S. norm is only one checkup at six weeks postpartum.

  • In stark contrast, Ireland guarantees home visits from a midwife or public health nurse for six months after birth, with continued visits over four years — and reported zero maternal deaths in 2022. (Commonwealth Fund, Oct 2025)

Moms and mom-to-be,

You are not a burden. You inherently deserve support.

INFORMATION, RESOURCES, AND SUPPORT

Postpartum Support International (PSI)

"Perinatal (pregnancy, post-loss, and postpartum) Mental Health Conditions are the highest complication of childbearing – and often the most overlooked and stigmatized complication." - PSI

Postpartum Psychosis Task Force

PSI HelpLine (not a crisis line)

• 1-800-944-4773 (4PPD) #1 En Español or #2 English

• Text in English: 800-944-4773
  Text en Español: 971-203-7773

• The HelpLine will provide you with support and resources.  You will be asked to leave a confidential message and a trained and caring volunteer will return your call or text.

National Maternal Mental Health Hotline:

• Call or text the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline 833-852-6262. 

• Hotline Counselors are available to discuss and explore next steps for you and your loved one.

• Available 24/7, in the United States only.

National Crisis Text Line:

• Text HOME to 741741 from anywhere in the USA, anytime, about any type of crisis.

National Suicide Prevention Hotline & Website:

• dial 988

• https://988lifeline.org/

• Call for yourself or someone you care about; free and confidential; network of more than 140 crisis centers nationwide; available 24/7